Psalm 127:3
“Children are a gift from the LORD; they are a reward from Him”
So much of who we are as men and women is rooted in the parent/child relationship. I believe that my role as a mother will greatly affect the kind of woman my daughter will become. I also believe that moms are the primary teachers in a child’s life. Yesterday, we identified three steps we can take to be the moms God wants us to be:
- Be a mom who loves God.
- Be a mom who prays continually.
- Be a mom who gives time.
Next step is … - Be a mom who encourages.
Today, let’s talk about being a mom who encourages her children. In 1 Thessalonians 5:11, we find the simple but life-changing directive, “So encourage each other and give each other strength”. When we encourage our children, we deposit strength in them. We need to be careful to keep their emotional deposits in balance. Many kids are in emotional bankruptcy because constant withdrawals of criticism are made with few deposits of encouragement. Our job is to study our kids and discover their strengths and weaknesses. We need to understand that many times, their greatest weakness may very well become their greatest strengths.
As a child, I was very stubborn. I know. It is almost impossible to imagine - almost. That stubbornness often got me into trouble, but it also made me the survivor of some very hard times. We need to look for the good things in our children and draw them into the spotlight. In other words, become their “encourager” and their “cheerleader.” Everyone needs a cheerleader.
5. Be a mom who laughs.
Proverbs 17:22 “A happy heart is like good medicine, but a broken spirit drains your strength”
Moms, we need to lighten up, or my friend's daughter says, “Chill, Mom!” Kids are fun! Find ways to bring joy and laughter into your home. Moms are the thermostats of the home and need to keep the emotional setting on joy. Children get most of their first impressions of God from their parents. I want my kids to know that God is a God of joy and laughter. Kids need a mom who laughs.
6. Be a mom who hugs.
Luke 18:15 “One day some parents brought their little children to Jesus so he could touch them and bless them”
Children need moms who touch them in a loving way and demonstrate healthy physical affection. The reality is that children not only need, but crave physical affection. It is a God-given need that is meant to be met in God-given ways. There is healing in a mother’s touch. Start early and never stop! It is a terrible shock for kids to have the hugging stop just at the age when they need it the most.
7. Be a mom who disciplines.
Proverbs 6:23 “The correction of discipline is the way to life”
Kids want and need discipline – whether they know it or not. Knowing is our job as mothers. Discipline is a hedge of protection in the life of a child. Part of our job as a parent is to tend that hedge, to keep it strong and in place. If we are not careful, every day can dissolve into a never-ending battle for control. As parents, we need to let go of what we can and hold our ground on what we can’t.
Discipline principles:
1. Be consistent
2. Discipline from love ... not anger.
3. Pick your battles carefully.
4. Don’t expect children to act like adults.
5. Teach kids that there are consequences to choices.
6. Realize that every child is different.
7. Don’t discipline until you have control of your emotions. This last point is major. We are the adults who should be able to control emotions. If we don’t, neither will our children. Proverbs 29:11 says, “Foolish people lose their tempers, but wise people control theirs”.
Pick your battles of discipline and wage them with emotions under control. Whatever you do, don’t put the light out in their eyes. Kids need a mom who disciplines.
8. Be a mom who forgives.
Colossians 3:13 13 Get along with each other, and forgive each other. If someone does wrong to you, forgive that person because the Lord forgave you”
We teach children how to forgive others by how we forgive them! Forgiveness is part of every healthy relationship so when we practice forgiveness, we are modeling healthy relationships for them. We also teach our children about God’s forgiveness by how we forgive. Be quick to forgive your child but be quicker to ask your child’s forgiveness.
Being a mom is the hardest job on earth! It brings out the best and the worst in you! I know that motherhood requires great sacrifice and limitless energy! But to invest your time and best efforts into a child, to watch that child grow and develop, is to be part of the creative majesty of life itself! Today, I commit to seek God’s power and plan to be a soon-to-be-mom who really matters.
Have a great day, Moms!
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